Why I Hate Coach Stephen – revenge is best served cold

This video is all about why Coach Rab HATES Coach Stephen. Now hate is a rather stiff word and should only be used in the sincerest of circumstances…this is one of those šŸ˜‰

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Transcription

i had a bit of a rough night my little one kicked me in the puss in the middle of the night so it kind of woke me up a wee bit so I’m going to give you a quick little life hack to save some time because I kind of slept in a little bit so watch this.

So, it’s nothing fancy just a quick trick. Save you some valuable time. [laughter]. Take this bad boy in the shower. The beauty of it is you don’t have to worry about spilling toothpaste down yourself because it just washes off. Save yourself a couple of minutes in the morning, pretty awesome.

So there we have it a quick trick to save some time in the morning. Brush your teeth in the shower. Right, I better get down to meet Coach Stephen.

Well good morning this episode is going to be called why i hate Coach Stephen because that feckerĀ did it to me and I thought you know what I’ve got plenty of ammunition on him so I’m going to do it back. Now, what you’ve got to understand about Coach Stephen is he’s a little bit of a jelly brain and by that I mean he forgets shit all the time. All the time. I mean it’s lucky old Rabby boy is on the ball because it’s the little things he forgets. So i’m going to show you.

I’ve just realised what, Coach Stephen, has forgot [laughter].

It’s always my responsibility though. Yeah, we’ve not got the tripod with us.

Tripod, matey?

What would he do without me?

Are you talking about me?

Did you get it?

I got it.

Got it.

Tripod.

And your water.

Fuck sake.

So there you have it now, Stephen, he is still a mate so I’m not going to bash him too much. There is a reason why he forgetsĀ things, he’s got a fairly young family and he’s not getting enough sleep at the moment so to be fair to the boy when he does get a good nights sleep he’s on the ball but when he doesn’t get a good night sleep which has been quite frequent lately he tends to forget things and is a bit of a jelly brain.

But because I am such an awesome, awesome, friend I’ve decided i;m going to help him out. I’m going to make sure he is wide awake for the rest of the afternoon and he is not going to forget anything today because I’m that nice kind of guy. Let’s get stuck in.

So, I feel like i’m in the back corner at the moment. I was tasked with one thing in fact to be fair I don’t actually know what they’re for. I got asked to get two white t-shirts and I brought mine nicely ironed and then left rab’s at home.

So, we’re going to go back to get it.

Right, we’re ready for coach stephen’s surprise here.

I’ve got to say I am very uncomfortable at the moment and for a guy who gets his ass out on camera in front of thousands of people, that is quite a statement.

Listen the last time i surprised you you got this awesome cake right, so just trust me.

That was an awesome cake.

Although with that blind fold you look like you’re going to rob somebody [laughter].

It’s a bit shaky. You’ll like the surprise.

Have you got a team of paintballers behind the wall who are going to paintball me?

Why would i do something like that? That sounds pretty cruel. You’re a mate I wouldn’t do that to a mate.

Is it a stripper?

Tonight is your night bro.

It’s twins? isn’t it?

Where is she?

if you could just turn around matey.

Tonight is your night bro.

Right, let’s see. This way a wee bit.

What the hell are you doing?

Trust me, it’ll be fine.

Oh look…nothing. [laughter]

Call this blind date.

I hear something opening like a bottle of whiskey, is it whiskey?

It’s quite refreshing like whiskey I guess.

Nice gin and tonic with ice and cucumber.

Well you’re very close there, mate.

What the hell is that?

Rab. I’m not liking this.

Now you’re going to have to repeat after me.

I’m too hotĀ to handle.

Do I have to say it in an American accent?

You have to say it in a Macho Man voice.

I’m too hotĀ to handle.

[laughter]

But too cold to hold.

But too cold to hold.

Moter fucker.

[laughter]

Revenge is a dish best served cold. I enjoyed that.

See you later, matey.

I knew he would do something like this. I just knew he would do something like this and these things ain’t quick to get off. Wait for me.